While in Prague and Vienna, I met a woman who came to live in America from the Philippines around 30 years ago. She lived through a lot and willing shared her story. We spent much time together. This woman is in her 70s. She told me that her culture and ways are quite different than her 4 grown American children (who were all born in the Philippines). However, she is close with them all.
In our conversation, she said to me, “I do not want to be a guest in my children’s house or their lives. I want to participate. Even though I do not understand their culture or their choices, I have learned to support them. They are not me. They are faced with very different things than me.”
Her words were soft and kind. Her tone was filled with love. I was amazed at her self control when she has gained so much wisdom through her personal experiences throughout her years. Because I knew I would be taking my youngest daughter to college out of state, I realize that she will not only be growing, learning and changing apart from me but she will experience a different culture unknown to me. She will not make choices based on my counsel any longer. How do I want to be? I do believe that most parents believe that their intent is based on love but their definition of love might not be interpreted as loving to their children. So, of course, loving is a given. But the behavior I choose to represent my love is accepting, encouraging, and kind. The verse in James says, “Be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry” because we need to represent the wisdom of God in our behavior and words. My children do not need contrarians in their lives as they have been raised to consider biblical convictions when assessing and deciding how to move forward.
Love is patient and kind. God’s kindness is powerful to lead us to repentance. We are asked to obey and abide in the light of a Loving God and represent Him. Then we can leave the results to God and trust Him for our children.
***We are heading to San Francisco for the Power of Love Conference next weekend. We will be at the Church of the Highlands in San Bruno. For more information, please call 800.992.0369. Mention this blog and you will get a discounted price! Thanks for reading…